Adultolescence

Come to Cleveland and See the River That's On Fire

2009-04-30T14:23:00.000-07:00

This video was purportedly made for the Cleveland tourism board in a hasty fashion. At least that's the premise, anyway. It's really just some hilarious guy on YouTube. Can you believe that?! Go figure! Wharf!

I know it has nothing to do with the Eric Fensler challenge, but someone's got to post shit to the blog. Step it up, Cock Knockiltree.

This blog will never end

2009-04-28T18:18:00.000-07:00

Nathan - worry not. I've got another challenge. Spotlight on an artist: Eric Fensler. Eric Fensler writes for Tim & Eric, and did those awesome GI Joe PSAs that flew around the net years ago. Find another awesome Fensler clip to post:

Holy Shit...

2009-04-27T11:06:00.000-07:00

Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit....

Dude I think that's it. That might be the end of this blog. Seriously The Apple fucks Gymkata in the ass and brakes Bravestarr's teeth down it's throat. Could we have finally found the best trailer on earth?

Let's break it down. In ultra-future of 1994, two kids try to get into the music industry and meet Satan or something? Dude sign me up.

Needless to say, my brother and I will be putting together screenings across the country of the Apple as soon as we can procure it. Please look for us in your local community centers, elk lodges and nursing homes. This movie's glory will not go malnourished and un-viewed.

Nathan, You Cannot Beat "The Apple"

2009-04-21T16:50:00.000-07:00

I found this on whythatsdelightful, and I'm afraid that there's little you can do to beat this trailer, Nathan. A pity, really. *Pets cat, grins toothily*

Kayne West, South Park

2009-04-14T17:07:00.000-07:00

I gotta start watching South Park again.

Kayne apparently liked it, according to this review he wrote on his blog in ALL CAPS. Now I know who's been sending me that nearly intelligible spam mail.

I Have Found the Worst Queen Song Ever Written

2009-04-09T01:09:00.000-07:00

Queen actually did this. They could have had Freddy Mercury just breeze through another great song, but they let some other guy write and sing one. These lyrics speak for themselves:

The machine of a dream
Such a clean machine
With the pistons a pumpin
And the hub caps all gleam

When Im holdin your wheel
All I hear is your gear
When my hands on your grease gun
Oh its like a disease son

Im in love with my car
Gotta feel for my automobile
Get a grip on my boy racer rollbar
Such a thrill when your radials squeal

Told my girl Ill have to forget her
Rather buy me a new carburetor
So she made tracks sayin
This is the end now
Cars dont talk back
Theyre just four wheeled friends now

When Im holdin your wheel
All I hear is your gear
When Im cruisin in overdrive
Dont have to listen to no run of the mill talk jive

Im in love with my car
Gotta feel for my automobile
Im in love with my car
String back gloves in my automolove

Jesus, guys. C'mon.

Did I Just See That?

2009-04-09T01:04:00.000-07:00

Can someone please watch this video and tell me if I saw the thing that I thought I saw? When you get to the part with the thing I think I saw, you'll know it. Most likely because you'll think you saw the thing I thought I saw when you see it.

EMBED-Dr Shine Is Gods Top Gun - Watch more free videos

KISS Shreads (and 'shrings')

2009-04-08T10:36:00.000-07:00

This one takes a while to get started, but give it a chance, Nave. I know you hip Brooklynites are quick to judge.

The My New Orange Shirt Show

2009-04-06T12:08:00.000-07:00

My buddy and sometimes writing partner Adam Mutterperl whipped this up. I think the name's hilarious enough on its own, but he added another spin on it that makes it especially brilliant. I think it's something that is going to play really well with our audience (i.e. Nathan).

For Andy...

2009-04-03T14:12:00.000-07:00

April Fools

2009-04-01T18:01:00.000-07:00

Bitch please. I knew about that lil' John mashup for a good long time. You think I only post new stuff? Bitch please(er). Here's something new - it's Qualcomm's april fools joke. I barely knew who they were or what they did, but now I do. They're those guys that made that funny April Fool's video.

Time To Hunkercise Bitch!

2009-03-28T20:26:00.000-07:00

Oh, did you just discover that little john mash up in LA? I saw that months ago- get with it it mutherfucker. Here's something you folks across the country will discover in a about three months no doubt.

You're Going to Need a Shower After This One, Nave

2009-03-22T15:43:00.000-07:00

This is Genius!!!

2009-03-12T09:52:00.000-07:00

So this is not really a response to our previous battle, Ochiltree, but it was too good to not post about. Here's Santana at his best with a stunning jam out performance!

Retort, retart

2009-03-09T22:17:00.000-07:00

What the hell is that trailer you posted about anyway? I mean, I can tell that it has ninjas with gardening/tunneling skills and a leader who's had at least a year of junior high school band, but I don't know what they do except jump kick inanimate objects and teleport. Are the spiders their rivals? Or a thinly veiled metaphor for man's fear of the unknown? Jewish, maybe? Just to show you I'm not all about ninjas, here's a little something:

And karate/ninja-ness aside, I found this and it's too great not to post:

He's a finely tuned killing machine, provided there's a pummel horse or parallel bars within reach.

S'not Bad...

2009-02-18T20:18:00.000-08:00

You had to bring in Ninjas? That's sooooooo '07. S0 this response might not seem great, but it might take some of your edge off 'ochiltree' (what kind of name is that anyway?). This is especially good if you hate these things: ice, shingles, forest tigers. But especially effective if you like these things: Drawn out boring voice overs, awersome whistles and (ugh) ninjas. Please enjoy.

Booyakasha

Round 2

2009-02-02T10:52:00.001-08:00

Consider this trailer for "Lethal Ninja" a warning shot, Nave. It's good enough to get things started, but I think we can do much better. GO!

Well played, Nave. Here's that white flag you asked for.

2009-01-29T17:28:00.000-08:00

After an hour of searching on YouTube, I realized that there is nothing I can find in the known video that could possibly compete with this:

And so, it's with a heavy heart that I offer my congratulations, and all semblance of manhood, over to my brother. May his loins forever burn from the fire of this victory. ADDENDUM: The best competition I could find was another Bravestarr clip, this one from the Bravestarr movie. Yes, there was a movie. And yes, it looks like it was total shit.

JUST HOW IN THE HELL DOES THE MOON WORK IN NEW TEXAS???

Riposite(sp?)- Brave Starr

2009-01-27T20:13:00.000-08:00

You had to go right for my jugular by whipping out Borgnine(sp?) didn't you!? You know how much I love cabby. However, I think this one might have you beat. I'm stuck between elaborating on how much this video takes you out and not giving too much away so that you can experience it for yourself. So to keep this brief, I'm forced to leave you with only these key points:

- spoken, poetic intro with a melodic motif floating in and out.

- a futuristic planet by the name of 'New Texas'.

- Sweet Native American main character beating up deathly pale looking fellows.

-Animatronic animal menagerie

enjoy

Counter Parry, Strike: AIRWOLF

2009-01-27T15:59:00.000-08:00

You've unleashed the beast, Nave. In this intro to the magnificent 80s helicopter drama 'Airwolf' (also known as "Knight Rider in the Sky"), we get ______ ingredients that make a wonderfully ironic bouillabaisse.

A thumbing synth track
Explosions, explosions, explosions
Ernest Borgnine

What are you waiting for? ERNEST BORGNINE. Go go go!

Bonus Borgnine!

The 16-bit Zelda II sequel that never was

2009-01-27T15:52:00.000-08:00

Hey, Nintendo. Ya, you! With the giant pile of money. If you had any balls, you'd pay Joakim Sandberg to make a full game out of his brilliant 16-bit arcade tribute to your award winning but stale tasting Zelda series. But you know what? You don't. That's right. And you can tell that plumber of your that I got his warp whistle right here. Toodle doo, homo-tards. (points aggressively and scowls)

Video below, download here.

This Is News! (part one)

2009-01-27T07:45:00.001-08:00

Times are hard, that's for damn sure, but that doesn't mean you can't make sound investment decisions. For instance, I've been putting money in bomb shelters, rafts, canned peas and Mohawk hairdos to prepare for the inevitable apocalypse (and post-apocalypse) we all know is going to happen on December 21st, 2012... wait, you don't know about the ancient Mayan apocalypse? Apparently neither did CNN, cause it's news!

And then they have the nerve to fight the theory with facts!!!(:)

"There is no serious scholar who puts any stock in the idea that the Maya said anything meaningful about 2012." Said David Stuart, director of the Mesoamerica Center at the University of Texas at Austin, who I'm sure was dressed in tweed, smoking pipe tobacco and listening to a giant old fashioned gramophone. Get your science out of my face, it's time that America got it's facts about the Mayan apocalypse from someone that really matters and that has always cared. Like The Day After Tomorrow director Roland Emmerich.

Yes if there's a world ending disaster movie to be made, Roland Emmerich will be there on the front lines with naught but a camera and 10.6 million dollars of special effects in hand. And that's what he plans to do with his new disaster flick 2012. He will tell the tale! He's the man for the job. After all, he earned the name "Honest Emmerich" after his truthful depictions of a globe fraught with warming (or freezing, or something).

Thank God for Hollywood.

So fuck you CNN. You see what happens when you try to go up against ancient Mayan, world ending predictions? You get schooled!

That XTC Video Was Cool, But...

2009-01-26T08:00:00.001-08:00

Here's a video that kicks ass (not to start another 'here are video clips from the 80s battle). Yes, the old classic Devo. They're the only band that was so post-modernly uncool that they were the coolest. Enjoy.

The Battle Continues- Parry: Dino Riders

2009-01-26T07:41:00.000-08:00

The intro I've posted below does not boast the sweet sort of songs that you've come to experience in the posts of the past, but I would like to point out that it does have space, dinosaurs and lasers. Bingo bango.

Holy Crap Report: SNL Actually Good This Week

2009-01-18T14:14:00.001-08:00

Couple sketches near the beginning of this week's SNL really surprised me. The first one here knocks it out of the park - great concept, great writing and great execution. THe second one is just a brilliant concept that peters out in the last minute. Still worth a view.

Video Recaps | Full Episodes | Webisodes

Bonus: Rosaria Dawson's magnificent breasts!

Upping the ante: ROCK LORDS!

2009-01-17T11:43:00.000-08:00

While I appreciate Bionic 6's family values and actual use of MULTIPLE LYRICS, I'm calling you out for Bionic 6's lack of dinosaucers, flying saucers, or some kind of combination of these two things. You've summoned the fury, Nave, and I rain it down upon thee in the form of The Rock Lords. They're like Transformers, but . . . well, you'll see. Steel yourself for the crushing blow!

What's Been in my Head for 3 Days

2009-01-17T11:10:00.000-08:00

I heard this XTC song on the (sadly defunct) Indie 103.1 on Wednesday night, and it's still bouncing around my cranium. When I was a kid would play XTC and I thought they were completely lame. What a retard, right? This stuff is great. A sign that I'm getting older? Or just smarter? Enjoy.

Tim and Eric Awesome Show!- Tour

2009-01-16T10:04:00.000-08:00

Tim and Eric of the best sketch comedy show that's on television now-a-days are taking their eclectic act on the road this month and you should go see it. If you don't know about the show, it's a hilarious endevour where the jokes come across as much in the editing as they do in the punchlines. Notable appearances last year were by James Quall, Richard Dunn, Bob Odenkirk to name a few. This year they've decided to go with more dates and bigger venues. To see if they're coming to a town near you, check here. I just got my ticket today and am ready and raring to fucking go at the end of this month.

I'll take your Dinosaucers and raise you the Bionic Six

2009-01-15T15:52:00.000-08:00

I don't know who did this theme song, but I want them inside of me... oh shit did I just post that on the internet?

Dino-saucers: Saucers that are also Dinosaurs

2009-01-14T17:20:00.000-08:00

I love the premise - so simple yet so limitless. I love that these Dinosaucers' primary power is turning into dinosaurs. I love the hover whatsamajigs. But most of all, I love the fact that the lyrics in their theme song consist wholly of "Dinosaucers".

Bonus points for the bumbling henchman at 0:31!

Kotaku = Hilarious

2009-01-09T11:22:00.000-08:00

Sony unveiled the box art for their 10th aniversary edition of Everquest- that's right it's been ten long years- next to this awkward looking elven princess. You know what, though? The sony representative next to her doesn't look much more enthused. He get nervous around elven princesses. There've already been a few hilarious observations. Here's the Kotaku article for what they had to say.

Ghostbusters finally gets a release date!

2009-01-09T07:31:00.000-08:00

After changing publishers and apparent failure before it started, a release date has finally been announced for the Ghostbusters video game. The week of June 16th 2009 according to Joystiq. This is actually to coincide with the release of the original blockbuster on blu-ray. Action packed week I might say. I'll be the first in line to gather at least one of those things, that's fo-shizzle. Eat your heart out Sierra, you fucked up!

The Nuclear Holocaust Is Upon Us!

2009-01-08T18:10:00.000-08:00

Ever been wandering around an apocalyptic wasteland and say, "Hey I really wish I had a Pip-Boy"? Well now you can! According to Joystiq.com, the Universal Display Corporation showed this Pip-Boy-esque wrist device for soldiers at the Consumer Electronic's Show in Las Vegas. They speculate that the nuclear apocalypse is right around the corner. I deduce they might be on to something...

What's a matter? Tired of hearing about Fallout?

Fallout 3 DLC: Cream in Jeans 2.0

2009-01-08T12:43:00.001-08:00

I wanted to make the title "F3 DLC: CJ 2.0", but found out that Roland Emmerich has a copyright on every acronym ever conceived. Plus, the 2.0 thing is a little played out. Everyone knows "Part Deux" is where it's at.

Moving on: More Fallout 3 DLC shots! Not much, but they're all froth worthy, to be sure. The 'ninja' armor, in particular, seems to have spazoids boned all across the interweb. I agree, it looks nice, but if it can't match my combat armor for defense and the tightly woven black mesh makes my penis sweaty, well then good by ninja armor. Functionality over form, kiddos.

Enjoy, thanks to Kotaku.

RIP EGM

2009-01-07T10:13:00.000-08:00

In case you didn't know, Electronics Gaming Monthly, America's renowned gaming rag is officially no more. As posted by Adultolescence's own Andy "Shabazz" Ochiltree, Ziff-Davis Media and Publishing, EGM's publisher, filed for bankruptcy in 2008 and had closed down it's PC Gamer magazine in November. Wellllll, it's official now our beloved EGM has finally been shut down, though the Internet offshoot, 1up.com was bought up by another major media giant- the Hearst Corporation. Here's me earlier today-. That magazine was the only reason I could put up with air travel, I don't know what I'm going to do now. As other Ochiltree can attest to, we've been reading that magazine since we were kids, it was like our estranged step dad that was only home once a month. I'll reiterate the Vanderbeek photo, but just so you know how much I'm hurting.

Oh, if you want actual details, try here

Gears patch.

2009-01-06T09:13:00.001-08:00

So we haven't posted in a while? What do you want, it was the holidays. Here's a story that didn't make it onto the other website I wrote for because someone had written it the exact same time as me... Alright some real content is sure to come later but enjoy this tasty nugget whilst you wait.

Gears of War 2 fans (all of us), rejoice! It looks like Epic plans to get a patch out for the game later this month, so sayeth Mark Rein. Epic's vice prez posted on the Gears forum this morning, promising to fix some of the problems that have plagued the multiplayer mode and add a few extra goodies.

Cheap-ass players beware; it looks like this patch is geared to you. "We're fixing a whole bunch of online exploits." writes Rein, "For example we've fixed the ability to wield an invisible shield, melee through some walls, gain infinite Lancer ammo and equip a shield and a two-handed weapon simultaneously plus many more." The patch will address other issues for on-line players such as spawn protection and a bigger penalty for leaving an unfinished match. Oh and the shotgun is being addressed, too: " We fixed the client side hit detection on the shotgun so that in a high-latency (i.e. "laggy") match, the shotgun will be more reliable."

Also promised were a slew of new achievements for the DLC. Here's the post.

Verbinski Bags Another Video Game Title

2008-12-17T12:58:00.000-08:00

Gore Verbinski, best known as the director behind the Disney smash Pirates of the Caribbean has just landed himself another video game movie deal. It looks like he's purchased the rights to a New York Times story about a Second Life affair in which a real life marriage was broken up when the wife found out that the husband had a second life mistress. Here's the Kotaku article. This is the second video game movie that Verbinski has bagged this year (the first, of course, being Bioshock) which leads me to believe that we might have another Uwe Boll in our midst. Here's to hoping that he's not trying to steal the crowning champ of shitty video game movie's thunder because I hear that Boll is a scrapper.

Surprising But Not...

2008-12-16T13:07:00.000-08:00

According to Kotaku's sorces job recruiters for various companies have been advised to stay away from those who play MMORPGs. A forum poster over at f13 forums said that a recruiter told him this after he admitted he spent to much time playing MMOs. Apparently it has to do with their "focus" and "sleeping patterns". Not surprising, really but what is surprising to me is that recruiters for major companies are taking wow so seriously. Just another way for the man to check in on your homelife. At any rate I'm sure most WOW players are keeping it to themselves anyway but if you're really proud of your undead warlock, you've been warned, lest you end up like the boys in the pic below.

Dude, what the fuck!?

2008-12-15T20:32:00.000-08:00

I'm a proponent of the whole "video games don't kill people, people kill people" way of thought but this is crazy. Apparently a 17 year old in Ohio shot his parents, killing his mother and wounding his father because they didn't want him to play Halo 3 and they hid it from him. The father was a pastor and figured the game was too violent for his son. Apparently the kid came into the room claiming he had a surprise for his parents when he shot them both in the head as an... act of revenge I guess? Here's the story on a Northern Ohio news site. I'm just not sure what to say...

Stermps!

2008-12-13T16:51:00.001-08:00

Know what Stermps are? You don't, but it's killing you huh? Scratch that itch by watching this aweserme SNL Digital Short from this past weekend. Make sure to notice Kristin Wigg's continued brilliance. With everything else she does so well, she can also knock intentionally bad, cheesy acting outta da park. After that, don't forget to peep "Jizz in my Pants", which I'm sure Lorne Michaels is just ecstatic over.

Video Recaps | Full Episodes | Webisodes

OMG DLC! Fallout 3 Extras Deliver Fresh Cream to my Jeans

2008-12-13T16:18:00.000-08:00

So I'm a little late on this one, but given that I see the Capital wasteland everytime I close my eyes these days, I think it deserves a better-late-than-never effort. Fallout 3's DLC will go a little beyond the scope of most of the DLC I'm familar with by offering new missions, a new campaign, and an entirely new city. Said city is the second of three to drop (March-ish); it'll be Pittsburgh, a city that escaped nuclear annihilation but has been ravaged by time all the same. You know what I want to see? Department store. Come on guys, you've already got the mannequins. Let's put them somewhere that makes sense.

The first morsel is a recreation of the famous tussle with those dirty Chinese for Alaska that we keep hearing about. It'll have new weapons and armor that'll be available in the main game. This is all wonderful news, but with 44 hours logged already I'm concerned this is going to pass from mere fixation to obsession. Bethesda, you ask too much of me.

Hit up Joystiq and Kotaku for more details and pics.

Box-Art Art

2008-12-10T20:07:00.000-08:00

Ok, while it isn't clear that nostalgia-tinged, clever photoshop is or is not actually art, one thing is for certain: it made me laugh and I'm posting it. The Atari box artist of yesteryear may have toiled in his efforts to bring semi-recognizable shapes and scenarios to life, but now we may ridicule their efforts with relative ease. Progress! I've posted a few of my favorites below, and to see all the orignals visit Might God King, HERE. Oh! I say!

Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena

2008-12-04T10:28:00.001-08:00

The Chronicles of Riddick game for the Xbox has the distinction, in many minds, of being the only great movie based game to ever come out - ever, ever, ever, ever. The White Elephant is returning in '09, in the form of a complete revamp of the first game, along with a completely new game on top of that. It almost sounds too good to be true, but after seeing this trailer, I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's going to seriously own. Vin Diesel - all debts from your life as a craptastic movie "star" have been wiped clean.

After you watch the trailer, get the pertinent, mouth watering details from Kotaku.

Animal Crossing drops the N-bomb

2008-12-04T07:15:00.001-08:00

Here's a good one: Nintendo programmers apparently programmed a racial slur into 14 version of their Animal Crossing Wild World that was sent to gaming jouranlists according to Kotaku.com. Anyway here's an artical about it from cinemablend.com... that I wrote...:

http://www.cinemablend.com/games/Nintendo-s-Animal-Crossing-Drops-The-N-bomb-13802.html

New Ghostbusters Trailer!

2008-12-03T13:30:00.000-08:00

Holy crap - this actually looks like it may be funny. My expectations are raised.

Portal Flash Game

2008-12-03T12:29:00.000-08:00

Portal was definitely my favorite part of the Orange Box and it ended much to soon. The game continues however in 2D. A couple of guys from We Create Stuff decided they would make a flash version of the excellent Valve game back when it was first announced. Obviously the puzzles aren't as intense as the 3D version, but a lot of the same designs from the original version stay intact. Great way to waste the day.

Check it out, here: http://games.ign.com/index/freetoplay.html/

Black Mesa Source Trailer

2008-12-01T19:54:00.000-08:00

No time to talk about it, but this shit looks crazy.

The Wii Problem: Part 2

2008-12-01T11:23:00.000-08:00

My bro and I just returned from visiting our parents in sunny Florida and I was excited because I'd be able to stay away from video games for a while, finally. Guess I was wrong, though. My parents recently bought a Wii and sure enough every night it was turned on and we were bowling or something stupid like that. I love the Wii, but I feel like it just added way too much video game into my life. I mean even our grandma played it. These were the same parents that told me that I needed to start spending less time inside playing video games like 4 years ago. Well the tables have turned. Maybe video games shouldn't be so excessable... for the sake of my sanity at least.

COD: World At War and the Wii Problem

2008-11-28T12:35:00.000-08:00

Recently a friend and I sat down with Call Of Duty: World at War for the Wii, Wii Zappers in hand, we couldn’t wait to dive into the update we’ve all been waiting for to the series, the coop mode. But after a few minutes in, we realized that this wasn’t what we had been waiting for at all.

The coop mode we played was nothing short of a sham. As second player I felt a lot less like I was with a squad mate helping take out enemies in the jungles of the Pacific theater and more like I had been on some retarded version of Mr; Toad’s Wild Ride. There was no split screen, there was no freedom of movement, no health bar. In fact the only reason I knew I was there was the little red aim sight that popped up when I pointed my zapper at the screen. This compounded by my friend’s aimless firing and turning as he tried to get a handle of the controls made for a very aggravating experience and some grumblings about how we should have gotten the game on the 360. That probably would have been the smart thing to do because a game like COD: World at War was made for the 360. The Wii’s unique control scheme does not really lend itself to it.

The huge sales figures of the Wii have convinced gaming companies that they can simply convert their old go to franchises and open them up to a new audience. The problem is that these games can’t be converted to the Wii and continue to be fun. They need to come up with innovative ways work with the Wii experience. Some companies have and you’ll see games like De Blob, which actually uses the Wiimote as a Wiimote instead of as a 360 controller.

It’s fun to think that you and your friend can digitally hit the shores of the pacific together with little plastic guns in concept but when you actually experience it, it’s a bit of a failure. As a rule I would probably leave the games that were made for the Xbox 360 to the Xbox 360.

The Feast, It's Ruint

2008-11-24T15:56:00.000-08:00

This is one of my favorite commercials. So silly, so quick and so funny. That is all.

Black Dynamite

2008-11-22T14:11:00.000-08:00

Ok, so this gag of intentionally bad, striaght up 70s movies is getting a bit played out by now, but this still looks pretty tight.

Gmail Themes

2008-11-21T14:17:00.000-08:00

Google didn't need to do this. We ALL use Gmail. But then they go and sweeten the pot with customizable themes, including one bad-ass theme that makes your inbox look like an Apple II or something equally archaic. ROCK. Not everyone's got themes yet, so if you don't, Google hates you.

EGMasaurus Rex May Be Extinct

2008-11-20T16:24:00.000-08:00

Ziff-Davis has declared bankruptcy and, as we all know, print is dying a slow and very painful death. So good old Electronic Gaming Monthly is probably on the chopping block. Nothing's official, but it's looking that way...

http://kotaku.com/5095112/print-version-of-egm-may-be-on-its-way-out

Bike Hero!

2008-11-19T09:48:00.000-08:00

Guitar Hero, recreated with a bike, 5 flashing LEDs, tons of chalk and probably some whippets. Remember when you were young and had time enough to pull off crazy ass $hit like this? Ya, me neither.

TeachStreet: Interweb street smarts, fo' real

2008-11-18T22:12:00.000-08:00

Former JibJab mentor and all around awesome start up guy Dave Schappell has expanded his site, TeachStreet (camel casing FTW!) to the Bay area. TeachStreet, also available in Seattle, is like eHarmony.com for continuing education. Meaning, they provide the means to hook up people looking to learn with people looking to teach. One big difference? TeachStreet's cool with jews.

TeachStreet's not in LA yet, but as soon as they are I'm going to try to sign up for some coding classes or video game design classes, you can bet yo ass. Here's that URL, for those that missed it:
http://www.teachstreet.com/

Dues Ex 3: Those French Bastards May Be Onto Something

2008-11-18T10:49:00.000-08:00

First few morsels of concept art from Dues Ex 3 have hit the inter-tubez thanks to Game Reactor. Not much to say, except that the second shot is looking like Tyrell's office from Blade Runner, at least in terms of color and composition.

The Oozinator

2008-11-17T17:33:00.000-08:00

Goyuken - Reason Alone to Get SF IV

2008-11-17T10:26:00.000-08:00

Some of us old timers may remember Sheng Long, whom EGM cruelly teased as being a secret playable character in SF II as an April Fool's joke in 1992. Disillusionment with the magazine, and the world as a whole, served to crush the fragile souls of many children when they learned the truth. But Capcom has offered us salvation! I'm already psyched as all hell for Street Fighter 4, but the fact that you can finally play as Ryu and Ken's master, Gouken, is amping this my anticipation for SF 4 from "Hard on" to "Ultra Stiffy" on the boner index. Watch!

Street Fighter 4 'Gouken' trailer HD

The JibJab Fanbase

2008-11-15T09:30:00.000-08:00

We just released our ElfYourself content this past week (http://www.elfyourself.com/) and it's had quite an effect on one fan. Wait, does he count as a fan of JIbJab if he thinks we're actually a cadre of wizards who project movies onto the back of his eyeballs? Just watch.

Street Fighter Four release date announced

2008-11-14T18:07:00.001-08:00

Capcom has finally announced a release date for the long awaited fourth (or is that four hundredth?) Street Fighter game. It will reach US shores on February the 17th (hitting the UK a little after Feb 20th). If you have not seen or heard about the next installment of the series you'll be surprised to hear that the usually hand drawn esthetic is being replaced with 3D modeling. The action is still pretty linear though. Don't know about the rest of you, but I'll be tearing shit up with Ken Masters come February.

Eat, drink and play multiplayer with the touch of a button!

2008-11-14T04:45:00.000-08:00

... or maybe not. Uwink is Atari co-founder Nolan Bushnell's new interactive restaurant that all you Hollywood socialites can visit at the Highland center. The premise is pretty straight forward: with uwink you are able to order your food and drinks with the touch of a button on the flat panel monitors that adorn every table (This takes away all that awkward waitress talk). As an added bonus, each person can play multiplayer games with the other patrons on those screens. The games look fairly simple, almost like those trashy trivia/gambling games you see in your local dive, but the prospect of playing with other players is tantalizing. Unfortunately (according to correspondents of the MTV multiplayer blog) it doesn't exactly work. The service buttons don't exactly get you served and the games suck. Below is a link to the restaurants home page and a link to the blog all about it. I know a blog linking to another blog, it's lame. But what do you want for free?

http://multiplayerblog.mtv.com/2008/11/13/atari-founders-restaurant-debacle/#more-13544

http://www.uwink.com/restaurants

AWESOME

2008-11-12T13:02:00.001-08:00

Actual Iron Man Suits

2008-11-11T20:19:00.000-08:00

Those nutty Japanese have done it again. Apparently robotic help with picking up items is already available for Japanese consumers, but the tech is getting better. Below is a link to an article about a Japanese company, Cyberdyne(!!!), which has created robotic suit-ish things to help the elderly with all of those pesky stairs. The suit is called HAL (Hybrid Assisted Limb [hard to shake those 2001 vibes]) and it is an exoskeleton that supports its own weight and some of yours. Good news everyone. You can rent two legs for a cheap $2,200 a month (if you live in Japan)! So quit bitchin' about how 2008 eight isn't the future of flying cars and robots, and remember when you're watching most sci-fi movies from the 70s-80s that suggested our ultra future by 2005 (or 1997 in the case of escape from NY) that it's just around the corner. Pick one up today. I mean if this can help old people up stairs, imagine what it will be ale to do with young, vibrant people...

http://scitech.blogs.cnn.com/2008/10/24/real-life-tony-starks/

Crayon Physics

2008-11-11T13:49:00.001-08:00

Crazy busy and don't have much time left on my lunch, so i'll just say that this game is incredibly ground breaking. To put it simply - it lets you draw gameplay elements (platforms and such) in order to get a ball from one side of the screen to the other. Only this video can do this amazing game justice:

Crayon Physics Deluxe from Petri Purho on Vimeo.

The Fallout Warrior

2008-11-08T12:02:00.000-08:00

The Fallout series kicks ass. Since the first one hit shelves in 1997 it's style made it an instant classic, inspiring the creation of great games like Bioshock. But we can't forget what inspired its look, mainly Australia's Mad Max movies. Bellow is a clip of one of my favorite Road Warrior moments. I guess you could say a group of "raiders" confronts a "Megaton" type settlement. Oh and notice the leather jacket on Mel which Black Isle took outright for the first Fallout.

Show me your Persona

2008-11-07T21:26:00.000-08:00

So recently I've been living under a rock and I completely missed this little announcement from Atlus. Another Persona's on the way and if you basked in the presence of Persona 3 this should give you a straight up boner. For the uninitiated, the Persona (shin megemi tensie [totally spelled wrong] in Japan) series spans back to the snes and is a classic amongst Japanese console RPGs. The most recent installment, Persona 3, was an insanely expansive game which was basically like Pokemon, the Sims, Diablo and FF rolled into one. You create relationships with people in a strange life simulation mode but after each day it's straight into the RPG in which you can persuade the monsters you fight to be on your side. It's an insanely fun experience, if you're ready to deal with the Japanese-ness of it all. However, I'm informed that the forth installment will becoming to the PS2? The third one was released on the PS2 march of this year. Really? I think it's about time to change platforms. Anyways below is the trailer video for it which is actually pretty lame because it's just a little anime thing... but at least you can laugh at it... or I don't know maybe you're into that sort of thing... Uh, enjoy!

Snuggie - The Blanket That Snuggles!

2008-11-06T13:59:00.001-08:00

Christmas is only weeks away, and if you're anything like me - your present prayers have been answered by the Snuggie. Besides looking like an awesome druidic robe, the Snuggie also grants the wearer +5 to Snugicity.

Find more info at http://www.getsnuggie.com. Find the Snuggler HERE.

VOTE!

2008-11-04T10:28:00.000-08:00

Just a friendly reminder. The title screen below is all that exists of an election video game I wanted to make. I never got past this point. Why? I was playing games.

Thanksgiving with the Boys from Brazil

2008-11-03T18:08:00.001-08:00

I gave my standard treatment to our newest Thanksgiving Starring You video that I do for most of them: cast Hitler in every role. It makes for a surreal and oftentimes awesome video. We've got tons of awesome, funny Thanksgiving eCards at JibJab, many of them written by me! Click here to check 'em out. Enjoy!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Making Movie Magic, with a Game Boy

2008-11-03T14:11:00.000-08:00

I don't have much time to post this, but here's an amazing little thing I saw this morning. Both the animation and music were created with Game Boy. Not sure how the animation works exactly, I don't think it looks nearly pixel-y enough, but the music is 8bit all the way. Check out Kotaku's post for more info.

Hasselhoff Flogs Self for C&C: Red Alert 3

2008-11-02T17:59:00.000-08:00

Ironic humor and retro kitsch are damn near reaching critical mass, and are in danger of imploding completely if this recent campaign for Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3 is any indication. Featuring an obviously soused David Hasselhoff, this fake infomercial features plenty of self effacing comedy, irreverent explosions and dolphins. Try as he may, Hasselhoff will top this. These do have some funny stuff and are worth it to see if you're tracking the gaming industry:

http://www.conquerthislife.com/

Here's irony and nostalgia done right. It's from a pilot by Ben Stiller, Rob Schrab, Jack Black and Owen Wilson about a super intelligent astronaut (Black) and his only friend - a talking motorcycle (Wilson). Enjoy.

Video Games and Pumpkins: Together at Last!

2008-10-31T12:55:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween! Here's pumpkins from some people who nerdliness makes me look like George Clooney:

Mario, Mega Man, Portal, the Red Ring of Death and more

Bowser, Castle Crashers, Final Fantasy's black mage and even more/

Obama vs. Palin: The Game

2008-10-31T00:19:00.000-07:00

Mercenaries 2 just released some new DLC, and it seems that even gaming isn't safe from election fever. For a small sum, you can make Sarah Palin and Barack Obama playable characters in Mercenaries 2. It's a little late in the game to introduce this, but you gotta admit that the idea of shooting a terrorist with a bazooka point blank as the future leader of the free world is pretty damn tits. I best be hitting the sack, so here's a link to Kotaku since I can't get G4's vid to embed: http://kotaku.com/index.php?refId=5071531&prevPage=true

ALF Fuckin' Rocks

2008-10-30T19:24:00.000-07:00

There is nothing else to say.

The Beatles: The Game: The Horror

2008-10-30T13:51:00.000-07:00

It all started with The Wall Street Journal reporting the MTV and Harmonix have struck a deal with Apple Corps (the company that handles Beatles IP, not the people who make iPhones, dumass) to include Beatles songs in a future edition of Rock Band. It then turned that MTV, Harmonix and Apple Corps are actually developing a stand alone Beatles game outside of the franchise. WOW. Considering that Beatles tracks aren't even available on iTunes, this is a big, big coup for the gaming industry. Suck it, Steve Jobs!

Here's Kotaku's post:
http://kotaku.com/5070885/mtv-and-apple-corps-join-forces-for-beatles-music-game
And here's the WSJ story:
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122531701276881747.html

I love the Beatles, and I love video games. So it stands to reason that I should love this too, but I just get a bad feeling from this. Kinda like when I heard that The Who were going to jump on the Guitar Hero/Rock Band bandwagon. With half of both these bands dead, it just kind of seems like they're digging up the dearly departeds' corpses and giving them all a good humping. To quote John Lennon: "Imagine all the people...raping my rotting corpse."

Big Daddies, Samus and more - Awesome Game Costumes for H-ween

2008-10-29T13:19:00.001-07:00

That's right, H-ween. I'm a busy man. Check out the video below first for an awesome father-daughter Bioshock costume, and then hit this link for some more inspiring masterpieces.

Louie Armstrong Sings 'Super Mario World'

2008-10-28T18:18:00.001-07:00

Big thanks to fellow JibJabber Dan Milano for this one. If you're tracking Ghostbusters III, Dan's got just the blog for you.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Happy Fallout 3 day!!!

2008-10-28T07:20:00.000-07:00

I just picked mine up just before work now I just have to wait 9 hours. Expect a post around 2AM eastern after I've gotten some play time in.

ANDY UPDATE:
I've just received mine at the JibJab offices and am considering faking AIDS so I can go home and play right now. But I've got more class than that - I'll just wait until shortly after 7 to race home, boot my girlfriend off the TV, hook up the 360 and just wail on irradiated zombies for hours on end. In the meantime, here's some tasty Fallout 3 links.

Fallout 3 Collector's Edition (Kotaku): http://kotaku.com/5069898/check-out-my-sweet-pip+boy-watch

Fallout 3 Reviews:
IGN: 9.3
1up.com: A
Sweedish PC Gamer mag: 81%
PC Jeux Magazine (French): 93%
Gametrailers.com: 9.4
Wired: No score, but seems like an 8 out of 10.
GameSpot: 9.0
AVERAGE: 89.5

I refuse to count that 10/10 OXM review. The smell of dirty money's all over that thing. Fallout 3's not gonna win game of the year, but shit - it's good enough for me to feel excited for tonight. Strangely, GameSpot's not featuring their review...maybe because it's plastered with Fallout 3 ads right now? Review to come!

Bejeweled is Gay, But This is Cool

2008-10-27T19:34:00.000-07:00

I think that game Bejeweled, which is on work computers everywhere, is game (gay AND lame) but this is an interesting article. If you're at all interested in game design, this is important information. After all, if you really want to understand the combustion engine, then you need to understand fire. Plus, the picture with the article was cool. And ya, a little gay.

http://www.wired.com/gaming/gamingreviews/magazine/16-11/pl_games

Norm Mcdonald mocks roasts

2008-10-26T09:13:00.000-07:00

The recent Bob Saget roast on Comedy Central was typical for the event. Everybody tried to be as crude and 'edgy' as cable would allow. But then Norm McDonald took the stage and made a mockery of the whole thing. This is hilarious, no matter what your frat brother tells you.

Gameplayboy

2008-10-25T12:46:00.000-07:00

If it wasn't official already, it is now: gaming is main-fuckin'-stream. Grace Kim, a former Activision employee and certified boner goddess, is going to be none other than (drumroll please) . . . Miss November. Now, I haven't bought a playboy for YEARS, but I just may buy this one. Eh, who am I kidding? No I won't. That magazine's an f'in rip off anyway and with so much porn on the web...I can't believe anyone buys it anyway.

Here's her page on Playboy's site: http://www.playboy.com/playmates/galleries/playmate-of-the-month/grace-kim/grace-kim-gallery-3.html

Here's Kotaku's post: http://kotaku.com/5067776/activisons-ex-is-now-playboys-miss-november-and-she-prefers-rock-band

COD: World At War Gets Zombies

2008-10-25T10:50:00.000-07:00

It seems that the world of gaming is experiencing quite an outbreak these days. First WoW's new expansion is overrun, then GTA 4 gets brain fever, Saints Row 2 has a hidden zombie mini-game, and now COD 5 has officially succumbed to the plague. Here's the deets, taken directly from Kotaku, because it's Saturday, Ann's parents are in town, and I have clean the damn house:

"It's a four-player co-op mode pitting you against endless waves of Nazi undead. Man, that sounds cool just saying it. The mode features its own economy economy in which things like buying weapons as well as making barricades and moving obstacles cost money. Yes, flamethrowers are involved."

I have to admit that the whole economy part might have sold me on it. Here's Kotaku's original post on the subject:
http://kotaku.com/5068751/because-zombies-%252B-anything--more-awesomer

Chrono Trigger on the DS!

2008-10-24T05:00:00.001-07:00

If you're an avid game player than you probably have already heard about this. Chrono Trigger is making its way to nintendo's hand held system! That means sweet 3D graphics and kick-ass stylus game play right?! .... Right? Nope. Too bad this one is just a straight up port. It kind of pisses me off that Square Enix would put all there efforts into making average FF games all new and cool and not do the same for one of the best games they've ever come out with. Hey I'm a huge fan of the game, don't get me wrong, and I understand not messing with the something that's awesome but it's been a good 12 years or so. I've played the game so many times, I don't need to play the same thing again. I'd rather shell out $30-$40 if they had at least attempted to change it around a little more. Well the guys at IGN got their hands on in and here's what they have to say:

http://ds.ign.com/articles/923/923277p1.html

Epic Games Going Hollywood?

2008-10-23T20:48:00.000-07:00

Variety reports that Epic Games may be gobbled up by Legendary pictures. In case you don't know whoLegendary s, they're one of the companies behind the Dark Knight so, you know, they've got some catch right about now. Dude Huge is gonna be able to buy all of North Carolina. Here's Kotaku post on the original article. How many degrees of laziness is that? Jeez.

http://kotaku.com/5068101/epic-games-to-be-bought-by-movie-studio

Grand Theft Auto of the Dead

2008-10-23T20:35:00.000-07:00

Zombies in GTA 4? I have to admit that this probably the coolest DLC I've seen yet.

http://www.joystiq.com/2008/10/23/rumor-gta-iv-dlc-brings-quarantine-zombies/

Looks like Grand Theft Auto 4 owners may get a chance to put eratic driving and spontaneous acts of homicide to work for the Lord. Now if they can just release a patch that lets you kill Michele. And then wait until a zombie epidemic - and then kill her again.

Wanna Start a Diablo 3 Fansite?

2008-10-23T20:21:00.001-07:00

Sure ya do. C'mon, man - do Blizzard a favor and help them canvas the internet with Diablo 3 news/advertising/newsvertising. Just take the materials you find at the link below and whip something up - you know you want to.

http://www.blizzard.com/diablo3/media/index.xml#fansitekit

Snark aside, this is a pretty great idea. I'm sure it's been done before, but this is the first time I've seen it in the world of gaming. Very clever, Blizzard. VERY clever.

Facepalm!

2008-10-23T09:59:00.000-07:00

Here's a little diddy Dan Milano, my cohort here at JibJab, wrote about the current financial crisis - I provide guitar and madness.

Sorry PS3 Owners, Pt.2 - Fallout 3

2008-10-23T08:29:00.000-07:00

So...apparently Fallout 3 looks pretty inferior to it's 360 and PC counterparts. Bummer - glad I waited to buy it though. Now I can go ahead and buy the 360 version. To put it in terms we all can understand, the 360 version is Alec Baldwin, while the PS3 version is Danny Baldwin - same-same but different. Click here for Koatku's article on the subject.

Sorry PS3 owners

2008-10-22T19:38:00.000-07:00

Came across this article on IGN.com. MGS 4 on 360? Oh my!

It's a little speculative but I'm sure it boils your blood if you're a PS3 owner. Right bro?

Lost Season 5 Trailer!

2008-10-22T19:30:00.000-07:00

Couldn't find the embed code, so click below to bust on through:

http://spoilerslost.blogspot.com/2008/10/first-real-promo-for-season-5.html

Nostalgia Supreme!

2008-10-22T18:40:00.000-07:00

With all the mention of Megaman and Castlevania SOTN and other classics on this blog I became a little nostalgic for the games of the past. If you ask me, game play has definitely gotten better but what's really suffered with the next generation of gaming is the music. Orchestrated music composed by Danny Elfmen? I don't want to say that games like Fable over played the value of music, but I think they missed the point. So here's a link to a site that explains exactly what I mean:

www.vgmusic.com.

It's filled with classic video game music that you're guaranteed to spend hours upon hours sorting through. The best thing about it is that it's pretty much all old midi sounds that duplicate the old vg music you're used to hearing. God bless Nintendo for keeping the midi game strong. So here are 5 songs that will rock your socks: classic, midi, retro style.

They are:

1. Super Mario RPG- Marrymore

2. Earthbound- Drug Store

3. Zelda: Wind Waker- Below Deck (pirate ship)

4. Castlevania: SOTN- Marble Gallery

And (of course)

5. Final Fantasy- Battle

Bioshock 2: Bioshockier Trailer - HI RES

2008-10-22T17:56:00.000-07:00

So I gave y'all the Bioshock 2 teaser in crappy handcam during this weekend, but IGN's gone and posted a high res version. (Shakes fist) IGN!!!! Enjoy, and let the speculation begin!

`

And here's the other links I posted on Saturday:

Trailer speculation: http://www.gamesradar.com/f/what-secrets-does-the-bioshock-2-trailer-hold/a-20081016133817404072

Bioshock 2 is both sequel AND prequel: http://www.gamercenteronline.net/2008/10/17/bioshock-2-is-both-sequel-and-prequel/

Totally unnofficial but completely awesome Bioshock 2 art from artist Ben Mauro: http://benmauro.blogspot.com/2008/02/mid-term-update.html

And, since the sequel is rumored to tie in with the film adaption Gore Verbinski is readying, here's an article on that: http://www.joystiq.com/2008/05/08/bioshock-movie-in-development-gore-verbinski-directing/

Dead Space and the Mechanics of Fear

2008-10-22T09:54:00.001-07:00

Dead Space is supposed to be the scariest thing since Steve Balmer, and apparently for good reason. Popular Mechanic's got a great story on their site about some of the particular design and gameplay decisions that EA Redwood Shores made in the interest of spookifying this thing to the max:

http://www.popularmechanics.com/technology/reviews/4288269.html?page=5

Star Wars MMORPG!!!!

2008-10-21T14:16:00.000-07:00

Here's the link: http://www.swtor.com/ Haven't gotten to check out the site much yet, but take a gander - woo hoo!

Samuel L. Jackson Confirmed for Iron Man 2

2008-10-21T13:16:00.000-07:00

Apparently he'll have a bigger role in it. Here's AintItCool's post on it: http://www.aintitcool.com/node/38802

But the real reason I made this post is to show the video below. It's from the mid/late 90s TV movie adaptation of Nick Fury, starring none other than David Hasselhoff! David Hasselhoff in an eye patch is even better than you're imagining:

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night and Other Greats

2008-10-21T09:45:00.000-07:00

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night is one of my favorite games of all time (I'm playing it for the third time now, in fact). Racket Boy's done an interesting post on the subject of PS1 games that defined the history of Playstation and guess what? Castlevania: SotN made the list. It's an interesting retrospective, fo sho. A little too heavy on RPGs, if you ask me, which you didn't. Oh, and they only gave "honorable mention" to the GTA series. Questionable. Check it out here:

http://www.racketboy.com/retro/2008/10/games-that-defined-the-history-of-the-playstation-ps1.html

More Mega Man 9 DLC - Fake Man

2008-10-20T07:58:00.000-07:00

Mega Man fans must be very happy lately, what with the release of Mega Man 9 and all the sweet DLC they've been throwing their way lately.

DLC like this guy: Fake Man. "But wait," you're thinking "That's obviously a cop, Andy. Shouldn't he be called Cop Man, or Police Man, or Localized Law Enforcement Individual Man?" Ya, I guess, but that would have Mega Man shooting up the Po-po, which is a serious no-no here in the states. Mega Man as a cop killer? Sounds like an assload of litigation for Capcom. Now I understand why they rejected my ideas: Junkie Man, Pimp Man and Stereotypical Italian Gangster Man. See a bunch of Mega Man robots over the course of original 7 games HERE.

Fake man's only available on Time Attack mode and Time Attack mode's only available if you no job, and no desire to play the other dozens of great games that came out this year. Capcom's also releasing two harder difficulties, in case you like to torture yourself. They release today, tomorrow and wednesday, for the Wii, 360 and PS3, respectively. More updates on Mega Man 9 DLC as they happen.

Thanks to Kotaku for posting this news.

50 Cent and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

2008-10-19T11:45:00.000-07:00

I read about this game in EGM a few months ago, and could hardly believe it was being made. Here's the scenario:

"50 and his buddies fly to some vague Middle Eastern country to play a benefit concert, get stiffed for their payment (a diamond-encrusted skull, no less), and end up embroiled in a massive firefight with several warring factions over the aforementioned bling."

HA! I'll finish the rest of the story for you: 50 kills a bunch of Arabs, personally firebombs the cave of Osama bin Laden, takes a dump on the Koran and releases a new line of sneakers. This makes me wonder why we ever sent troops into Iraq in the first place when we could have just told 50 that Saddam owed him 20 large.

The game fell off the map for awhile, and then came back with a new publisher: THQ. Not that I've ever held THQ to any standards of excellence, but this is just hacky, irresponsible publishing. Do we really need another game about making the Middle East a smoldering crater? One with 50 no less? God save us all.

Here's Joystiq's post on the subject:
http://www.joystiq.com/2008/10/19/bbfc-seriously-thq-is-publishing-50-cent-blood-on-the-sand/

Here's 1up's preview: http://www.1up.com/do/previewPage?cId=3167181

Bioshock 2: Bioshockier

2008-10-18T13:07:00.000-07:00

A little game named Bioshock made quite a splash last year (pardon the pun) and it's Big Daddies are set to make Playstation 3 owners everywhere their bitches on Cocktober 21st. They also had another treat for the PS3 owners patient enough to wait - an exclusive preview of Bioshock 2's trailer.

Guess what? Someone on the internet went and blew 2k's load. All over YouTube. And now it's here too, along with dozens of other blogs I'm sure. Enjoy...

This is a mildly hopeful teaser. I could debate the meaning of it, but I gotta get a start on my day so here's another bunch of people doing it for me:

http://www.gamesradar.com/f/what-secrets-does-the-bioshock-2-trailer-hold/a-20081016133817404072

http://www.gamercenteronline.net/2008/10/17/bioshock-2-is-both-sequel-and-prequel/

Totally unnofficial but completely awesome Bioshock 2 art from artist Ben Mauro: http://benmauro.blogspot.com/2008/02/mid-term-update.html

And, since the sequel is rumored to tie in with the film adaption Gore Verbinski is readying, here's an article on that: http://www.joystiq.com/2008/05/08/bioshock-movie-in-development-gore-verbinski-directing/

And, lastly, a conversation between Puff Daddy and Bjork: